23 Weeks Pregnant With Hormones & Tears

Dec 21
NabanitaDhar

Written during my pregnancy, publishing now. Let me know what you think.

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Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and started crying for no rhyme or reason?

Well, I haven’t either, or rather hadn’t either, until very recently of course. It’s strange how I find myself so emotional at peculiar moments these days. It’s odd because there’s really nothing bothering me at this point in time. The only possible explanation thus is my pregnancy hormones, at least I think they are! Or, why else would I wake up at 4 am in the morning and start crying much to the horror of S?

Well, already into my 23rdweek of pregnancy, I don’t know if I’m ready yet. Yes, I have begun to feel the kicks too so I know it’s very real, this new thing that is happening to me, to us.

It’s a strange feeling really. It’s a huge reality to come to terms with, the fact that there is a living, kicking little human being growing inside of me. Wow! Maybe somewhere in my subconscious lies the anxiety and apprehension of bringing a new life to the world. Perhaps that is the reason why I burst out at times. I don’t know.

Does it happen to all women?

Perhaps, it does.

That feeling when it keeps kicking or moving is quite indescribable actually. I might be in a meeting or simply engrossed in some deliverable when it starts shifting inside of me, almost vying for my attention. Or, better yet, kicking as if this is the FIFA final! This to remind me, perhaps, that he or she ( I know now it’s a she) is my biggest deliverable in the pipeline till date.

It is then that the thought that I’m not alone crosses my mind. In that fleeting moment I realise that I’m never going to be alone for a long time to come, neither alone nor carefree really.It’s a tough bargain, this decision to become a parent. It is miles off from being easy. Even after taking the leap there are moments of doubts, second thoughts. But then there’s this excitement of a new turn in life as well. So, I guess it’s scary in a good way. Well, whatever it is, I’m taking it one day at a time because thinking too much gives me goose bumps. Maybe, I still need to prepare, for I’m not there yet.

23 weeks gone, still, about 17 odds weeks left. A long way to go. The journey so far, for lack of a better word, has been exciting. And they say it’s only going to get more exciting ahead, of course, difficult too. Honestly, I don’t know how I’m going to deal with it. I really don’t. Maybe I’m going to be this emotional throughout. Or, perhaps show some other sign that scores of other women have shown during pregnancy. But I do know this, it is going to be my own unique journey, a journey shared and lived with S. That much I know I can look forward to. Of course, I sure hope that this new beginning, as they all say, is worth it at the end of it all.

Well, that’s all for today. Signing off with tears in my eyes for no apparent reason. Perhaps hormones or some other pregnancy related quirk, who knows?


Mommies reading this, do share your experience and your views, I’d love to read.

Until next time

Ciao.

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#MondayMusings

 

27 thoughts on “23 Weeks Pregnant With Hormones & Tears”

  2. Oh, I so relate to this…anything emotional in a book or TV made me burst into tears…. 😛 and puzzled the hell out of my hubby. Well written.

  3. Very honestly expressed as always, Nabanita! The good thing is that as the hormones kick in, there are tumultuous changes that happen inside our bodies…happens to all of us! I went through it too, and had similar thoughts…quite overwhelming for a first-time mother who love freedom and living their own life! I went through all of that Nabanita so I perfectly understand. My worst however was after my son was born and the post-partum depression nearly killed me! Thankfully, these hormonal changes dont last long!

  5. I have heard a lot of women say that. May be it's the hormones or the nervousness about the change?

  8. Thanks for sharing your experience, Esha… It gives me a lot of courage and strength to know that other women too went through the same, women whom I interact with online or in real life, no just through some random article on net..SO, thanks again for sharing your experience

  10. I think it is a mix of both…Atleast a lot of women feel the same way so I guess I wasn't the only one 🙂

  11. Ah yes I am going through this at the moment, although I'm further along than 23 weeks. Started crying at a Christmas carol today, oh dear! haha!

  15. Congrats Naba and welcome to the mommies club. A huge responsibility as you have written and those hormones, OMG, I would feel as if I was literally tasting them…

  20. Oh all the best and take care Mica…have a safe pregnancy and enjoy the phase…Look forward to your little one 🙂

  21. Naba, I have been through it twice and I can tell you with all of this I still say that I enjoyed and cherish every single second of that journey called pregnancy and motherhood. 🙂 Enjoy your journey. The hormones do take over many a times. But it is all worth it. 🙂

  24. I really don't remember but yes feeling weepy was common. The hormones do play havoc and also the enormity of feeling a life within you.

  25. I really don't remember but yes feeling weepy was common. The hormones do play havoc and also the enormity of feeling a life within you.

  27. For me, the overly emotional bit lasted until I was 6 months postpartum. At that point, I was not sure how much of it was hormones, how much was just plain anxiety. But this I am sure of – all the food control and sleep deprivation clearly did no favors to my state of mind.

    You will get through it. We all do. And yes, it is all worth it (though you surely know that by now).

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