Monday mornings. Tell me how do you feel about them?
You wish to know how I feel about Mondays first eh?
Honestly not good at all! Let’s just say the week would have been a lot better without Mondays in it! Too much? Maybe. But I could certainly have done without this very Monday.
You know it began with our stand-by Manager, (yes better to call him that!) sitting in the comforts of Melbourne, shooting a number of mails to us here. Let’s just say they were such that we all just wanted to stop working altogether.
You would have come across people who don’t listen to anyone but continue living in their own concocted universe? Yes? I thought so. You know as much as I’m for ‘to each their own’ ideology, it becomes a tad harder when the person refusing to listen to any argument turns out to be your manager. So here we began our Monday with a mail exchange which, let’s just say, was our version of fighting off a school yard bully. How successful we were? Well, only time will tell. Bullies don’t change within a day, do they?
Enough of that though. Why should I give him so much space in my blog? Right? Mails over and done with and so he’s done with too, for today at-least. Tomorrow will be a new day. Tomorrow we’ll fight another battle.
But the bitterness certainly lingers. Is the concept of being on the same team, even though spread across two different continents, so hard to grasp? I’ve seen on many occasions, in my not so long career, that once people move to the ‘coveted onsite’ they seem to treat those back in India very distastefully. Now I find that very hard to understand because I never quite understood the lure of onsite in the first place.
Of-course, these are hardly discussed. We are expected to deal with it. That’s the elephant in the room you could say. We know it’s unfair but we are supposed to bow to every whim and fancy of those sitting at client locations. But that doesn’t work for me. So on occasions like today, when I see an unfair rebuttal of a sincere request, I end up having arguments. With a liberal dose of sarcasm I should add. After all, I’m doing the same work hence I ain’t keeping quiet, also knowing that I’m in the right.
Life would have been so much easier if people were understanding. If only they listened, don’t you think?
I wonder what happens when people move up the ladder. Do they forget the issues and struggles they had to face daily as beginners? Or, do they take out their frustration purposefully on subordinates? Sometimes I feel all this is done with spite. Exceptions aside, I’ve hardly seen a manager actually helping his or her subordinate. It’s almost as if they want to say that ‘I have suffered and so I’ll make you suffer too’. Some kind of payback, is it?
I don’t know what kind of a manager I will become. Only time will tell. But I don’t think I’ll turn into a bully who doesn’t listen to his own team members. Yes, I know I won’t be that.
Tell me your experiences with a manager or as a manager? Don’t you think a manager who bullies his team or who turns a deaf ear to the team’s issues is an out and out failure. I certainly feel so and it would suffice to say that our stand-by manager is one such soul.
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We've had some pretty nasty editors and colleagues too. But I have to admit I enjoy it when you write about office – even if it's about nasty people. It's been so long since I worked it kind of takes me back there. Though some of it wasn't nice, I did have some great times too. Your post sparks off a bit of nostalgia.
I had a boss who was a maniac. Though he was quite nice to me, he was basically nasty, short tempered and prone to slants. I also wonder how people become so insensitive. Perhaps they are on an ego trip. These days I enjoy working with clients as I am my own boss.
I was lucky enough to work with wonderful managers with dynamic personality, except one. That one experience has left be bitter for long so I can understand how you must be feeling. I hope everything sorts out soon.
Naba, no, you will definitely not be that. To quote spiderman, many people forget that power comes with great responsibility. You are expected to serve, not be served. It's sad.
Fingers crossed that you won't have any more run-ins with this person!
You will be an amazing manager, Nabanita, I am sure. A manager should always lift up the staff, not drag down, inspire and encourage and be the best example…. not like your's in other words. Eeeekkk:-(
I hate my Monday mornings…
I used to have such managers in my earlier organisation.
Thankfully, the one I have now is so much like you and me.
I hope that we dont end up becoming the stereotype managers at least
I think most "managers" I have come across are complete asses. Perhaps it is because they are under so much stress, perhaps it is because they feel so self important. Whatever the case, power tends to go to peoples heads.
My heart goes out to you dear, some people are really insensitive and ruthless and I have dealt with such bosses too. Once my boss asked me to complete his wife's project and I firmly refused to do so. he was sullen for a week or so.
After reading this post, I am reminded of that song 'Khooni Monday' from Go Goa Gone!!
"It's almost as if they want to say that 'I have suffered and so I'll make you suffer too'. Some kind of payback, is it?"Interesting observation with an element of truth…
There will always be 'good' manager and 'bad' ones. I have had my share of both, mostly good though thank goodness. However, I had a female manager that bullied me on a regular basis for a few years. I hated work and only put up with it as I had nowhere else to go and needed the regular paycheck. It was brutal. That sort of behaviour can easily have led me to suicide I swear! It is only this year that there is a law against such behaviour at the workplace. And now I have the total opposite of a manager: someone who is kind, generous, understanding etc. for the most part, though at times we have a disagreement due to difference of opinion. We're all human after all! 😉 <3 Good luck with your situation Nabanita. I hope it resolves soon or else it might be a good idea to leave, if that's an option for you... <3
Great thought provoking post Nabanita! Luckily, I had some good managers and I feel good about them. But yes, I know of other managers who treat employees as if they were born a manager. I work in HR and I have seen this personally that people quit jobs not coz of money or the role but cos of the immediate supervisor. Most of the times at workplace, we get both kinds of manager but after all we are the owners of our career. So we need to learn from every situation and grow as an individual.
Btw – Does your manager know you blog about him? 😛 What if he is reading secretly?
Parul
Glad this post took you to some great days… And don't worry I will write more about office especially since this guy seems to have been chosen as permanent and not stand by anymore!
Lucky you Rachna…When will I be my own boss!! sigh!
I hope so too Rajlakshmi…He's too much of a bully to handle !!
Thanks for the trust vote Michelle…And I'm certainly keeping my fingers crossed…Let's see what happens!
You said it Eli…'A manager should always lift up the staff, not drag down, inspire and encourage and be the best example.' Where are these people I wonder?
I hope so too…Though must say lucky you! 🙂
So true Kathy….Even I think the power gets to their heads! sigh!
Oh these bosses when will they ever run! You know the same song comes to my mind on most Mondays 🙂
Oh well some agrees ? 🙂
There are all kinds of managers out there. I was not an effective one because I was too sympathetic. While listening is important sometimes the manager has no power to change things, it can be very hard to tell people they just have to get the work done if you can't see the need for it yourself.
A good manager is empathetic and encourages team work. Poor you – having a bad manager really sucks!
Oh sometimes I do think about leaving Elly but then I think about all the managers I have had so far… You know I have, maybe, had just one or two good managers…So then I stop thinking what's the guarantee that the next one would be nice…So will fight this one out Elly 🙂
Haha no he doesn't and even if he does I don't care… God he is such a jerk..Why don't the HRs come up with some policy to punish these managers? 😀
I know 🙁 sigh!
Oh I wish this was that case Vanessa…This one just refuses to listen … I mean he is , let;s just say, a jerk and a bully in the guise of a manager!
If we're talking retail managers, I can attest that they are extremely overworked, incredibly underpaid, and get stuck with the crappiest jobs. I cannot begin to count how many inappropriate tete-a-tetes I had to break up in the restrooms.
hahah! same pinch!!
I hear you sistah… I have been facing such things too.. Frankly I do not bother why they do this. The bad effect that has been on me is that I have lost the zeal to work or try and move up…So it is being very difficult for me ….