I talk so much about moms and being a mom that somewhere along the line I seem to have lacked considerably in giving dads their due. Being a daughter to one of the best dads in this world, I think it does reflect poorly on me. Moreover, if I want to be completely honest about parenting and all that it entails on my blog, then I cannot talk about it from only the perspective of a mother. A father is equally important, if not more. So, today I want to talk about the dads, the fathers, the pops, the pappies and the papas – the men who shape our lives and don’t even make a fuss about it.
Dads & Daughters
Dads, like moms, are the guiding lights along that dark path of life’s struggles. A good dad gives us a chance at a good life and we all know how important that chance is for each and every one of us. He helps us navigate this maze of a life and with no expectation of anything in return except maybe love.
But when it comes to daughters, fathers are something else altogether. There is just something in this bond which is inexplicably strong. It gives strength in ways unimaginable and it’s filled with so much love that it’s actually overwhelming.
I have seen how much M needs S and I know this isn’t going to change anytime soon, or most likely ever. A few weeks back when S was out of town, there was this one question M asked me every night before going to sleep. When will papa come back? She needed to know. And even if she is too small to really understand, I knew she was missing him. I could see that she was. So, I tried to step up my game, to be there for her in ways in which S always is. In fact, that week was the first time I took her to the playground in our apartment. But it is something only S does with M and that’s probably why even M remarked how she likes the playground better when he is around. Fathers can’t be replaced and if you are a daughter, there is that special bond you have with your father that’s hard to replicate with anyone else. That’s a dad for you.
M too is her father’s daughter in every way possible from the way she reacts to things to her food choices. Every single day she needs to know when S is coming home. If he is late from work, she wants to wait up for him. She absolutely hates it when I force her to sleep without seeing him at night. Truth be told, I remember not being able to sleep well when dad would be out for site visits, returning late at night. In fact, I would only sleep easy when I heard his car being parked. I also have this memory of a 4 or 5-year-old me standing on a footstool at the door waiting for him. Dads are special for us girls and I think it’s a bond we draw strength from. We need them dads and I know they need us too, such is the rapport.
Daughters look up to their fathers for everything and why not? They are the superheroes without capes though they sometimes even don the capes for their little ones. They are the ones whose mere existence gives the confidence that everything will be okay even on the worst of days. They are the shoulders to cry on when the world gets too much. Of course, every dad has his heart stored away with his kids and there is nothing he wouldn’t do for them. I have seen that with my dad. I am still seeing that with my dad and now with S.
Dads and daughters, they are each other’s strengths. If something happens to the other, they break. I remember once when I was a little girl, my dad got sick and had to be admitted to the hospital. It was around that time that I was also going to perform with a dance troupe. Naturally, I couldn’t because dad was our priority. In spite of being sick, the one thing that bothered him and brought him to the verge of tears was my not being able to perform. Silent bundles of love they are, I must say.
I see the same kind of love for M when I look at S and it makes me rest easy because I know he’ll catch her when she falls. In fact, he’ll do everything possible to not let her fall.
I cannot imagine a world without my dad. I cannot imagine where I would have been without him. In many ways, the reason why I chose S was a lot of his qualities mirrored my dad’s. That’s what happens they say, isn’t it? Daughters always look for their dad’s qualities in their life partners. It makes sense, doesn’t it because dads form such a huge part of our lives and are the only perfect men we know?
So, here’s to dads and daughters. Here’s to a love that only gives!
