If we were having wine, I would tell you it has been a long time. Yes, a long time since we met last. What can I say? I suppose life got in the way. It’s funny because I never let pregnancy or even a baby get in the way of posting regularly on the blog. But in the past two years, I have slacked off quite a lot. The last time I was here was sometime in September last year, and after that, I just didn’t feel like writing anything. But I’m here today, and we shall see where we end up.

One of the reasons why I don’t feel like writing here anymore is that blogging has changed so much over the past couple of years, too much for my liking. There was joy, camaraderie and the feeling of being read just for the sake of being read, a few years ago. But now, I’m not even sure blogs are read anymore. The attention span has altered, and also, everything has become so commercialised that I don’t know if anyone blogs just for fun these days. Blogging now seems like a chore, SEO, optimised pictures and what not? I’m honestly tired of hearing these terms. Where is the freedom that once came with just writing your heart out? The whole ecosystem seems to have altered so much that I barely recognise it anymore. I have found myself wondering if there is any point at all in keeping this space open. So, if we were having wine, I would probably tell you that.

Between the last time we met up here, I also managed to publish my book, Letters in Ice. It’s an ebook and is available all over the world on Amazon. It’s a historical fiction set during the second world war, a story that came to me when I was in Germany a few years back. If you are a reader, do check it out.

One of the strange things that happened since I published my book was that a few folks came up to me and told me they would read my book if only it were available in their country of residence on Amazon. Then when I informed them that it was indeed available, the response was either that they only prefer paperbacks or on the lines that they don’t have a Kindle. Of course, I then told a few that a Kindle is not needed to read an ebook, and just the Kindle app will do. But here is the thing, those who read will read and those who won’t will always have excuses. So, if you don’t read, you don’t need to come up to me for lip service because I haven’t even asked you to read, have I?

Honestly, it’s not even in my nature to ask for something. That’s just not me. I’m awkward, I admit it. On those occasions that I have tried, it has always come from sheer awkwardness. And the responses, or the lack of the same thereof, have just validated my view that those who would like to pick it up will pick it or share about it without me having to ask them to do so. The good thing is those who read have loved the book. Yes, some wonderful people have picked up my book when they didn’t even have to, and I’m obliged to them for that forever. 

So, if we were having wine, I would tell you that I’m now a published author, albeit self-published through KDP. It’s something, isn’t it? I would also tell you what a fool I have been for years. This silly me has always made sure to purchase the first books by my acquaintances from the blogging or writing world. It is something I liked to do until very recently. Over the years, people have approached me to write reviews for their books and spread the word about them, and I have done so gladly. But after my book, I have realised that I probably was being too emotional about it. I think it’s okay to not go above and beyond for others because nine out of ten times, no one will do the same for you. You see, I knew this lesson by heart. But when it came to books, I tended to ignore that. Not anymore. I’m human after all and I do get hurt. I’ll restrict myself now. I’m not one to ask something of someone and I won’t be fooled anymore.

If we were having wine, I would tell you 2022 has come with Covid19 and Kidney Stones for me. A few days before my birthday this year, I had to be taken to the emergency room with acute pain in my lower abdomen. And what did I learn there? Kidney stones! Well, I suppose, I should be grateful it wasn’t something else. They have suggested some kind of surgery but hopefully, it won’t be needed. Fingers crossed! I guess we should have a beer instead of wine, right?

If we were having wine, I would tell you that as a mother I don’t think I can ever have a peaceful vacation ever. Well, either as a mother or as the daughter of ageing parents. Sometimes it gets to me. But that’s how life is, I suppose. But I still haven’t given up on finding something for myself.

If we were having wine, I would tell you that I have to start going in to work at least 2 days a week. I don’t know how I feel about that, to be honest. On one hand, it would be nice to be away from home while working but on the other, I’m not sure if I’m up for the commute and the conversations. I’m a homebody and I’m the happiest at home. So, we’ll see how that goes.

If we were having wine, I’d tell you I have been meaning to start writing my second book but I don’t know how to find the time for it. Sometimes I wonder how did I even write the first one, that too when M was a baby. But I have to find some time, don’t I?

If we were having wine, by now I would have been high. So, I think we should call it a night now. Let’s hope I can be regular going forward.

Cheers!