Present Day
Ella opened her eyes slowly but all she could see was a blue haze around. She felt a burning sensation all through her body which was excruciatingly painful too. It was as if something hot; perhaps boiling hot was being poured all over her body. She could neither feel her lips nor move her neck all she could do was look from the right to the left by the only movement she felt capable of, the rolling of her eye balls. She tried over and over again to move but couldn’t.
“Where am I?” she seemed to ask herself. Apart from returning home from the market one night she couldn’t remember anything. The severe ache and stinging sensation further prevented her from doing so. She found it hard to breathe and at every moment felt an unquenchable thirst; as if she had been without water for generations.
“Where am I? What is this place and why can’t I feel anything?” she struggled to recollect.
She felt parched and dry; she tried to wipe off the haze in her vision by rubbing her eyes but where were her hands? She just couldn’t feel her hands! It was like a horrible dream. It was as though she was stuck somewhere trying hard to make sense of it all but simply couldn’t. Just about then a name came to her mind, Palash, yes only he could get rid of all her confusions; only he could solve this conundrum for her.
Ella tried to call out to Palash but she seemed to have no control over her voice. All she managed to say was ‘Paa’ and then felt a strikingly cutting sensation around her throat. This was extending beyond anything she could fathom. No matter how much she tried everything seemed bizarre and weird.
Ella continued with her struggle to make head or tail of where she was or what had happened to her. Perhaps even try and wake up from this reverie, if it was any. Suddenly she heard some footsteps which were getting closer to her. She turned her eyes towards the right and there seemed to be standing two blurred figures. One of them seemed to be a woman who appeared as some sort of khaki haze to her while the other a man who was in something white. Slowly as Ella looked toward the left, there stood a male like figure who looked familiar to her but she couldn’t put a finger to the reason why.
She could hear her name or something of the sort in the conversation going on around her. She was near them but the voices seemed to come from far. She needed answers; she wanted to wake up from whatever this was. She wanted this dilemma to end; she wanted answers.
Six years back
“Is this our house Palash?” exclaimed a visibly excited Ella. She wore a red chiffon saree with golden beads all over the body. With golden sleeveless blouse, a mangal-sutraaround her neck, gold earrings, golden and red bangles and tiny red bindi; Ella looked heavenly. Her lustrous black hair, parted just at the point where she had applied vermillion, reaching upto her waist made her look every bit of a newly wedded bride. With eager and expectant eyes she looked around the one bed room house that was to be the witness to the beginning of their lives together, her and Palash’s.
“Yes it is Ella” saying that Palash took her into his arms. He was the complete antithesis of Ella while she was sophisticated, extraordinarily beautiful, exceptionally well educated and hailed from a well to do family; Palash was mediocre in every aspect. He was lean, a below average appearance coupled with a demeanour one wouldn’t normally associate with a suave man. He had just landed a job at a hotel in Amroi but that was in any measure just meagre compared to what Ella had grown up with. Her parents weren’t happy at her choice but they conceded to their lovely daughter’s demand; after all if she was happy there was very little to object about; wasn’t it?
Ella had left a successful career and job to move to Amroi where Palash had his job. It was too small a town to have any opportunities for Ella but she made peace with herself and her desires about her career for Palash’s sake. Afterall, if they were together than this sacrifice on her part was just minor compared to the beautiful life they had ahead.
Palash looked into Ella’s khol lined eyes and as Ella looked back, all she could see was love but at the same instant she remembered the words of her sister who happened to be extremely sceptical about Palash.
She had said “Ella love is fine but when a man is not successful in life, he eventually rakes havoc in the lives of his loved ones and everything however rosy comes to an end”.
Palash hadn’t yet secured a stronghold in terms of earnings. Infact, their marriage expenses, the advance to their new home was all taken care of by Ella’s savings. Perhaps somewhere in the corner of her heart her sister’s words resonated and scared her. However, she let that be and merged into the strong loving arms of her husband. She felt safest there and she was adamant to fight every obstacle in the path of her happily ever after so long as he was with her.
Present Day
“Ella, Ella can you hear us?” said the figure in khaki.
“Uaaa mmm” was all Ella could manage as she gasped for breathe and water at the same time. She tried again and again but in vain.
“Waa Waaata” was all that escaped her mouth.
“What? What was that Ella” asked the figure in Khaki for a second time.
Gradually the voices seemed to get clear in Ella’s head.
The shape in white seemed to say “It is normal in such cases. I think she wants water but we can’t give her any right now”.
She felt indescribable pain but still couldn’t comprehend what they were speaking about. Just then she heard a familiar voice one that she had got used to listening to over the years; yes it had to be the voice of Palash.
“Is she going to be alright?” he seemed anxious. There was something about his voice today; he seem worried perhaps but not really however anxious certainly.
“I wouldn’t lie to you Palash but it is nearly impossible. Her vital organs are all damaged. The extent of injury is beyond repair and we are sorry but it’s just a matter of time before..” and he stopped saying anything.
Two days back
“Stop it Palash!! It’s enough” cried Ella with a two and a half year old baby in her arms.
Palash looked towards her indignantly as though he just hated her presence.
“Stop drinking. You need to get out and get some work or atleast let me work. We can’t go on like this. There is a baby we need to take care of for crying out loud!!”
“Stop your bickering. I know what I have to do, don’t you dare try to teach me bitch” exclaimed Palash as he ran towards her and pulled her hair. It wasn’t the first time and she knew it wouldn’t be the last. She managed to get out of his hold and put the baby in the cot. Tears rolled down her eyes, the happy life she had dreamt off seemed to have lost its way and now seemed to be a distant dream.
“Six years back I left everything for I thought you were man enough but I was wrong. You ruined everything and all you can do is drink and beat me. I won’t take this any longer” cried out Ella.
She had come back from her parents’ just a week back but the pride in her prevented her from crying her heart out to either her parents or her sister. She didn’t want to come back to Palash but then she knew it was her decision to be with him in the first place. Somewhere at the back of her mind that was what forbade her from telling her family that their fears and apprehensions had come to pass.
“What? How dare you raise your voice at me? I am the bread earner of this family”
“Yes one who hasn’t brought anything home in months” retorted Ella.
That was it Palash was now a mad man. On top of being drunk, he was enraged. His ego got the better of him, if there was anything ‘better’ left.
It has become very regular more so in the past three to four years. Palash would drink, abuse Ella with words and even hit her from time to time. There was no reason to believe today would be any different so Ella walked to the kitchen to prepare food for her baby, the only possession of hers that gave her the will to carry on. Never in her wildest dreams would she have imagined what was to happen next.
Plash walked from behind her, shoved a piece of cloth down her neck, all the while beating her. After that he did the unthinkable; he poured petrol that was for his bike on her. Much before she could realise and fight back, he had lit a match stick and left her to die a painful death in the kitchen. She struggled but the flames consumed her faster than the realisation of what was happening. The door was shut; she tried to move from left to right but to no avail. Horror stricken she left fighting and fell on the floor. The shock and betrayal had killed her will to live even before the fire did. She lay there engulfed in the burning sensation while Palash looked on from outside the kitchen window. It was over, her sister was right, all was gone.
Present Day
“It will be a while before you will be able to take any statement from her officer, if at all any” said the figure in white. He was the doctor attending to Ella. The one in khaki was the lady inspector assigned to Ella’s case. They walked out of the burn unit which has blue walls. There was a pungent smell all around; that of burnt skin and flesh perhaps.
Palash stayed back.
“I want to be by the side of my wife officer” said Palash in a manner that would melt even the coldest of hearts.
When the coast was clear with no one in sight, Palash moved towards Ella, pulled a chair and sat as close to her as he could. Looking towards her with a vengeance he whispered “Ella, if you say anything to the police I shall kill your son too. Can you hear me bitch?”
At that moment everything came back to Ella. She remembered everything that had happened. Her soul ached at the memory of how she was left to die by the one she so loved. Tears had dried up for the extent she was burnt didn’t leave anything within her. The day they met for the first time came flashing back to her mind; she remembered how Palash had wooed her; how she had convinced her parents to marry a man who in every aspect was evidently inferior to her; how she had given up everything. There were signs but she had chosen to ignore that and now she was at the verge of death. The man who promised her a life of love gave her the most painful death possible. The man who was the love of her life burnt her mercilessly. Yes, it was her love that killed her!
As she lay in pain, lost in thoughts the lady inspector walked in again.
“Ella can you hear me. Tell me how did this happen”
Ella looked towards the Khaki figure with her eyes or whatever was left of it. Suddenly the thought of her child came to her, his innocent face. She wanted to say it all loud whatever happened but no matter how hard she tried she just couldn’t.
“Waaa Paa” were the only words that could come out of her. She tried with all her might and sincerity but failed.
She wanted Palash to be taken away for her son was better off without him than with him. But she was so badly burnt that it was impossible for her to speak. Her soul finally left her body; she died in vain; she died before putting the man responsible for the act behind bars; she died before she could save him.
Message
This is for any woman who is in an abusive relationship, please let go and walk out before it’s too late. Life is too precious to be wasted on someone who cares more about himself than anything else. Love isn’t synonymous with suffering. It is something beautiful. Ladies if your man doesn’t respect you; leave him for he is a scum not worthy of anything but scorn.
Some men i don't know why they even exist in this world,the post depicts the harsh reality of our society.
Very well written.
Harsh reality… Cruel and Ugly!
Very sad…She really did die in vain!
Kept me engaged till the very end. One friendly recommendation, if you don't mind my saying – please proof read once again, I did spot a few typos.
Thanks Rickie appreciate your recommendation will definitely keep that in mind… 🙂
Indeed Harsh!
Thanks Rajnish and I agree I too can't fathom why some men exist !!
This could be anyone's reality. Sad, but true.
life has an ugly side too ..whch is sad but thats irony of life.
dark side of the society
You are so right Akanksha…!
It is indeed sad !
Undoubtedly!
Sad truth for many women. I don't know why we put up wth such things!
So sad and frustrating, knowing that this is the truth for many women! Extremely well written, Nabanita.
Beautifully written, the back and forth flow in narrative was well brought out!
Keep writing and spreading joy 🙂
The sad satte of affairs in this country where one has to think of social status and log kya kehenge causes so many women to remain quiet 🙁
At times I wish I was an Expeditor or Enforcer who could go about teaching rogues like Palash a lesson!
And the point here to consider is how far was alcoholicism resoponsible for Palash's change in character or was he inherently cruel? Can love mask crulety and evilness that easily?
Long comment – I know but once again Nabanita brilliant writing!
Daroon likhechen 🙂
Beautifully written, the back and forth flow in narrative was well brought out!
Keep writing and spreading joy 🙂
The sad satte of affairs in this country where one has to think of social status and log kya kehenge causes so many women to remain quiet 🙁
At times I wish I was an Expeditor or Enforcer who could go about teaching rogues like Palash a lesson!
And the point here to consider is how far was alcoholicism resoponsible for Palash's change in character or was he inherently cruel? Can love mask crulety and evilness that easily?
Long comment – I know but once again Nabanita brilliant writing!
Daroon likhechen 🙂
This was very numbing .. and worse is the realization that this happens very often
Touching and very well written! 🙂
Bitter, honest and thought provoking. I liked it!
Thanks Mahesh; its always nice to know your thoughts about my posts 🙂
I agree a lot of women remain silent for the social stigma associated with either a divorce or separation..Its sad really… And for Palash I feel he was inherently a cruel man…
Indeed Puru!
Thanks 🙂
Thanks Soumitra 🙂
We need to analyse why the initial love turns to hatred later !
I feel there is a need for compulsory pre-marital counselling for all !
Well written !
Keep writing !
Yes indeed and we also need people to recognize that there is a problem and that counselling is not bad!
Thanks 🙂