Sweet Are The Uses Of Adversity

Apr 2
NabanitaDhar

Do you believe in the adage ‘Sweet are the uses of adversity‘?

If you don’t then read this.

***

I slowly opened my eyes and everything seemed hazy. There was excruciating pain in my legs and my palms. Everything was blurred and all my friends looked on with worried and perplexed expressions.

 

They all seemed to be moving and so was I.
 
 
‘Don’t worry dear, you’ll be fine’ said one of my friends but I couldn’t understand why. Then it hit me. I had just suffered burns and was being rushed to a hospital. The first thought was ‘Why me?’!

The Accident or as I now see it, The Blessing.

 

It was a cold winter night in Gorakhpur. I was in the 6th semester of Engineering with placements just around the corner. But I wasn’t prepared at all. There was no way in the world I could afford being sick, let alone be stuck in a hospital with severe burns. The irony was I had just decided to start preparing for the damn placements, made a schedule and had even put all the books next to my bed. I was about to go for the kill just after dinner that fateful night but destiny had some other plans altogether! I wouldn’t be back to my room for a long long time.

 

In life, things seldom go as planned!

That night just before dinner, my roommate and I had decided to go to our friends’ room to blow off some steam with a round of gossip as we girls always did. In their room, there was a small double rod heater to which I sat next to. Now I must add here that, heaters were as a rule not allowed in hostels. But almost every other room had one as we always needed Maggie and coffee to survive the cold. Also as a habit we always wanted to defy authority; doing something against “rule” always had a fascinating allure. In retrospect, it was stupid and an invitation to a disaster that I soon found out.

 

As it happens on that particular day I was wearing a long white skirt with woolen slacks on the inside. I also had woolen socks on. So, dressed like that I sat next to the heater and what happened next was probably a result of my stupidity.

 

We got chatting with little idea of what was to befall? And then it happened. Suddenly I noticed the fire in my skirt. I stood up. And no sooner did I do that that my entire skirt was engulfed in fire. I could see the headlines for the next day ‘Girl burned to death in hostel fire mishap’. I didn’t know what to do!

 

I looked at my roommate and even she was helpless. I used my hands to douse the fire but ended up burning them instead. There was no time. I had to do something about it. I didn’t want to die this way; not now, not ever!

 

I do not know where but I suddenly got an idea and rushed out of the room, fell on the floor and started rolling from one side to the other. By then everyone had gathered around me, some shocked, some terrified while some rushed to get buckets of water; all the while everyone shouting out loud for help. The rolling put off the fire. Finally, some of my seniors threw blankets on me. Some poured water while others tore away the skirt or what was remaining of it. The woolen slacks and socks were now stuck to my skin. I was burnt severely up to my thighs. ‘That’s it my life is over!’ I said to myself.

 

The Hostel Warden, nincompoop as he was, didn’t come along to the hospital instead I was taken by my friends and admitted there. In all this commotion and all the pain, all that I could think of was how unfair God was to me at such an important point in my life!

 

As the days passed I grew irritable with no faith in God. I was in pain with no strength to study for the placements. I couldn’t walk properly. With every single step, blood oozed out of my wounds. My friends were all very helpful but gradually it annoyed them and rightfully so. I was becoming very ill-tempered. I knew they were all helping me but they could not feel my pain. There are no words to describe how hard those days were for me. It took an entire 6 months for the wound to heal. The scars stayed though as a constant reminder of that horrible night. I felt handicapped. I could hear people talking in whispers. ‘Her friends have saved her life still she is always in a foul mood with no gratitude’. I wished I could tell them that so much pain sometimes gets the better of you. But also I wanted to set the record straight. I saved my life by rolling on the ground. Nobody else did. They helped me later but I saved me. So, yes, these whispers, some unwarranted hurt me making me feel even more miserable. But something happened and this tragedy fell into perspective.

 

When I was in the hospital, I opened my eyes one day to see him standing next to me. He was smiling for some reason. He tried hard to be somber but he just couldn’t. He was the only one smiling in the entire room.

 

‘I am sorry, but the joke was hilarious which I realize you missed. How are you by the way? Nice way of taking a break from studies huh! ’ he grinned. He was the so-called ‘bad guy’ of our branch, also mischievous and always up to something. Little did I know then how he would change everything!

 

‘Ya right, why don’t you try it for a change’ I remember telling him.

 

We got talking. He cracked one joke after the other, even tried to speak in Bengali. ‘Aami tumake bhalobashi’ he said and again burst out into a cacophony of laughter.

 

His jokes changed the claustrophobic hospital room to a breezy hangout. He never showed me false sympathy. And he never expected me to be forever indebted to him for being nice to me when I had just escaped death. He took my mind off every worry and helped me relax in the most unassuming way. Perhaps because he was the only person who wasn’t judging me. In him, I found a new friend.

 

As my mood improved, I realized that things could have been worse. At least I would get better in 6 months and start all over again. Slowly I began to see all the positives and everything started to fall into place. My faith returned and I looked ahead to good things in life. I got placed in a reputed company. My wounds began healing more quickly. I was able to walk properly again whereas the doctors had said I would limp for the rest of my life. This accident also opened my eyes to my true friends. I was able to see each person for what they actually were.

 

2012

 

6 years down the line I am still friends with him but now he is my husband too. If it wasn’t for the burns then he would have never come to the hospital to visit me. If it wasn’t for that mishap, I wouldn’t have found a friend and finally a life partner in him. When I look at the scars now, it reminds me of our first date, our first holiday together, my first placement. It reminds me of all the good things that happened to me since. So, if Shakespeare said ‘Sweet are the uses of adversity’, he sure knew what he was talking about! Today I am a stern believer that everything happens for a good reason. In fact, I cannot thank god enough, for without the accident I would have missed out on meeting the love of my life. So trust me every adversity is just because God has something better planned for us hence Be Positive!

 

 

***

 

2018

 

It has been 12 years since that fateful night. 12 years since S came into my life. I won’t say bad times or lows don’t bum me out anymore. They do. But somewhere deep down I know that everything happens for a reason, probably a good one at that. That night getting burnt was probably the best thing that happened to me in college. It showed me who my real friends were. That showed me that when you help someone or are kind to someone, you don’t do that with the expectation that that person remains forever indebted to you. That night showed me that I had surrounded me with people who would be my friends till it suited them. But most importantly, that night gave me my life partner and now we are a family of three with our little girl. So, every time you feel like life is striking you down, take a moment to remember what you have, what you still have and can have. Trust me, more often than not, things will look up. Things do look up.

 

Be Positive! And remember, sweet are the uses of adversity.

 

Before you go, tell me about one thing in life that adversity taught you?

 
Sweet are the uses of adversity. #Mindfulness #Life #Positivity #Optimism #Mindful
Pic Credit: By PHOTOCREO Michal Bednarek via Shutterstock

This post was originally published in 2012.

88 thoughts on “Sweet Are The Uses Of Adversity”

  1. Is this also fiction… ? If not, then no wonders why your stories are so lively.. 🙂 …. By the way nice click..

  3. Wow such a cute love story! You are right strange are the ways of god. 🙂

  5. Lovely Post! Loved reading it. Thank God all turned out fine.
    Again, I love the way you've woven the words together.

  6. This is true love and what could be more positive than that .. God bless you both girl !!

    P.S. – on a tough day like today … this is just what I wanted to read for inspiration 🙂

  7. Hi

    That was very sweet and nice to read…Wishing you many many more years of togetherness,love and happiness 🙂

  9. lovely post ….all is well that ends well ………if it doesn't..it's not the end ……:) loved reading it 🙂

  11. Another great post, Nabanita! but this sounds special 🙂

    I too believe that all good or bad that happens to us, happens for some good reason. I liked your Shakespeare quote too!

  12. Hey Nabanita I think in those painful moments you lived the most beautiful ones of your life…Yes I too strongly beleive whatever happens …happens for the good! Love your post!

  13. Loved it.. M so sorry for my previous comment.. Here is something with the happy ending.. Very sweet love story:) God Bless u dear:)

  14. wow!!!
    A true story of grit, courage and love..loved it totally!
    glad for the way things ended for you, Nabanita!
    Wish you the best!

  25. Thanks for promoting my post Nabanita. I couldn't have found your blog otherwise. Loved reading your thoughts and how true you are that HE has better plans for us so Be Positive. Good luck and god bless.
    – was directed through indibloggers
    website – http://www.shoppingstylenus.com

  30. Very touching and powerful story. It seems to be reflective of you in a way… sweet and sensitive, yet also tough and gritty at the same time.

  33. I kind of had a tingly feeling that you guys might end up together towards the end of the story 🙂 So very well articulated. Thank you for the post – instills hope in people when they're bogged down by circumstances. Everything happens for a good reason is a good way to go – though when you're in the bottom of that pit it doesnt make much sense.

  34. Thanks Deepa 🙂 …'Everything happens for a good reason is a good way to go – though when you're in the bottom of that pit it doesnt make much sense.' — Wonderfully articulated !

  36. you just instilled my faith in the long tested words.. that Everything happens for a purpose and for good… 🙂

    i really liked the your story and the way you conveyed it to us…

    Thanks a lot for sharing …..

  40. I'm not a romantic guy but was truly touched by your story..
    Hats off to your abilities to turn emotions into words…

  43. Lovely story….made me reinstate my faith in miracles and magic of love

  45. Awesome awesome awesome is all what I can say, Loved your love story..its super lovely..

  50. I always think about things the same way . There is always a good side to every bad thing that happens in life
    Reading this brought such a huge smile on my face 🙂

    Hope you two have an even more amazing life ahead <3

  55. Dear Nab,

    Hi this is Jags I just read your blog and I agree with your view in totality…… this is the way to go….this is what life is all about….Actually I have written a writeup on adversity with a different point of view …..long back … Infact I will share a link to my write-up on adversity hope you will like it.

    http://jskolur.blogspot.in/2010/03/integrity-in-adversity.html

    hope you like it ….

    Regards

    Jags

  57. Thank you for taking time out to read my stuff and liking it too…. You know I find a lot of similarity in your thought process as compared to mine…… anyway looking forward to some more meaningful blogs from you…. by the WAY are you an engineer like me, if so i will share my technical blogsite with you …. But pl confirm before i share my link with u

    Goodnight Jags

  60. Hi Nabanita, When I started reading this, I was hoping this to be another of your fabulous fictions. I really didn't want this story to be your own experience as its scary and painful to imagine someone suffering from severe burns. Alas, I was wrong when I saw your pic in the end.
    I hope all is well now:) and your words are very inspiring. Everything happens for a reason… hard to believe it sometimes but its more or less the way god plans our life.

  69. Hi naba ….vinisha here …….just visited your blog ,…..and read some of your post too ….and i have to say that…. you haved really good writing skills ….i have to learn from it..:) keep writing 🙂 🙂

  73. This is so beautiful. I ve been reading all beautiful stuff in the blogosphere lately. 🙂
    This is to wish both of you all the happiness in the world 🙂

  75. Some people are predestined in life and situations crop up just to bump into them. 🙂

  79. Thank you! Tommorow is my paper and i am going to qrite your stiry if it comes but i will to sertain modification…..thank you once again

  80. So I came over here from your 99 things you love list. This must have been a terrible accident. Pain from burns is horrible and my mother tells me that cos I was 1.5 years old when I was trapped in a fire. I don't remember a bit but my Mum tells me I was in excruciating pain. I have scars on my face and hands. You will notice that if you see me. But people who see you beyond all that are the real gems. You found the meaning of true friendship and companionship in that accident. How else would you have met S? 🙂 Glad you were saved!

  81. I could so completely see your view point and what made you crabby and ill tempered. I am so glad S came into your life. Yeah, things happen for a reason. It’s just that it is difficult to believe it when you;re battling adversity.
    Obsessivemom recently posted…Mrs Funnybones #booktalkMy Profile

  84. Heartwarming and also introspective read, Naba. May you always be blessed with S and M by your side. I firmly believe in this too. Adversity comes to us for a reason- to make us stronger, to make us believe in a higher good. As long as we are enduring it, we don’t feel that way of course. Life has its way of becoming nasty. But once the clouds pass, the rainbow filters through. If it weren’t for my depression I would have never known so many things I know today. So yes, sweet indeed is adversity.
    Shailaja Vishwanath recently posted…Attention: A valuable asset for children and parentsMy Profile

  85. It looks like destiny was playing its own sweet game. I am glad that those scars now mean something else and they remind you of better memories. I cannot even imagine the pain you must have gone through. It hurts when friends have expectations or they feel you should be indebted to them. But you found someone so much better.
    Rajlakshmi recently posted…Zentangle Designs – TypographyMy Profile

  86. I’ve known your story about S even earlier but reading it this way brings a fresh perspective. God bless you, Naba. Yes, life is that way. It tests us but it leaves us with enough lessons to be grateful for. I’ve had my own share of misfortunes but overall life has been positive.

  87. Wow, Nabanitadhar, surprises always await us, in the world! As I started reading this piece, I could never imagine the ending would be this sweet, honestly.

    You guys must be ssoooo in love, aren’t you? And in constantly reminder of it?

    I love this.

    Thanks for sharing.

  88. I certainly do believe that to better appreciate the sunshine, you must endure cold and pounding thunderstorms. So I rather appreciated the take away of your journey. I am happy that you were able to find beauty because of your pain.

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