The Marriage (Certificate) Anniversary

Mar 9
NabanitaDhar

Look closely and you’ll see how adventurous life is in reality. No, not of the Everest climbing or sky diving type, while those certainly qualify. What I’m talking about here are quests very different and perhaps more challenging than those.

Source: Freedigitalphotos.net by samuiblue

These are crusades which people, regular people, find themselves involved in, sometimes more than once in their lifetime. These are more about emotional turmoils than physical pursuits. And quite a few of these are man-made too or rather imposed by society. 

In India, marrying the one you love, while still holding on to your sanity, often falls in this category. Call it struggle or fight, whatever you wish, fact is sometimes these quests become so excruciating that just the mere thought or reminiscence of it is enough to send you in a downward spiral of pain.

Just this past Saturday, S and I celebrated the 4th Anniversary of one such pursuit. Our marriage anniversary or the day when we won a huge battle in the long standing fight to spend our lives together. The anniversary of a not so perfect, yet in some ways perfect, day. The day we got our marriage certificate after a 5 year long courtship. Yes, sometimes we feel that’s what that day was for us in reality. But since crossing that day also gave us the life we have together, I guess in all fairness, it was all worth it in some weird twisted way.

“The biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams.”- Oprah Winfrey


Funny how this society conceptualizes marriage. It’s more about the caste, language and families rather than the individuals actually involved. This ‘to hell with love’ attitude, honestly, I don’t think is really healthy. Yes, it might have worked in the past but times have changed now. I’m not saying arranged marriages no longer work. What I’m saying is when two individuals have chosen each other as life partners it’s wrong to force them to go the arranged way. The choice of a life partner is probably one of the biggest and most important decision in your life and nobody has the right to have a say in it except you yourself.

 “..it’s not gonna be easy. It’s going to be really hard; we’re gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me… everyday.” ― Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

Maybe, the next generation will have it easier. At-least, I hope so. Till then I say, enjoy your adventures and whatever happens don’t let go of the one you love, of the one you choose. So, on a week where I recall my exploits of finally tying the knot with S, I wish you a life full of love and adventure. Well, maybe a little more love and a little less adventure, what do you say?

Source: MicroBlog Mondays at Stirrup Queens

29 thoughts on “The Marriage (Certificate) Anniversary”

  1. Agree to it fully. I went through hell and back for almost 4 years till I could got my certificate last year. It is funny how society forms its notions about marriage when all a relationship takes is a good understanding.

  2. The concept of arranged marriage is based upon getting everything right – right age, right family, right caste, right background, right wealth profile and even right eating practices but seldom about the right person. The saddest part is when 2 people know they are right for each other but have to go through their separate arranged marriage ways for succumbing to the numerous pressures of society.
    I am visiting here through Microblog Monday.

  3. Interesting Nabanitha.. the whole concept of parents being against due to caste or language is silly. You are right, the next generation will have a better deal. Congratulations on your anniversary.

  4. I think I have enough love battles to last me a lifetime … Oh why it's so tough to marry the person you love… so many barriers one has to cross. It's like a triathlon
    Happy anniversary … wish you two lots of happiness 🙂

  5. Belated happy Anniversary to both of you.. Only love matters in a marriage.. The silly fights are all part of it, isn't it? 🙂

  6. Belated happy anniversary! I am glad your love won over all other hindrances. May it always grow!

  8. Happy anniversary! The lengths one has to go through to get married, I know that only too well. But it's always worth it in the end 🙂

  10. Happy Anniversary! I had no troubles so can't comment on that. And I am pretty sure that our kids will find it way easier. 🙂

  11. Belated Anniversary wishes to you and S, Nabanita! Love marriages have never had it easy! Hopefully it would change in the times to come!

  15. Thanks Anamika… I agree…I think we have a very flawed concept of marriage here…atleast it has become flawed now…

  27. Congratulations to both of you, Naba. I remember parts of your story from your sharing on a forum. Your decision was a culmination of a wonderful story of love and faithfulness and I'm so happy for you that you had the courage to stick to your guns. God bless your love now and always! ♥

  28. Happy anniversary. I can't imagine what it would be like to be forced into an arranged marriage – it's hard enough staying married to the person you love, never mind some random guy.

  29. Happy anniversary Naba! I am glad you listened to your heart and waited it out during a five-long year courtship. How good of you and S to do. Wishing you both a long lifetime of happiness, love, and bliss. 🙂 <3

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