If not thought through, something seemingly harmless, even right, might be the very beginning of something wrong for the future.
What do you see in this photo?
I see a school girl, a young school girl, slowly being burdened in the guise of a school uniform. The first of many burdens, I should add. I see a school girl dressed a certain way to hide the society’s impotence, it’s inability in ensuring that she remains safe irrespective of her attire. I see a school girl draped in mekhela on account of her body changing naturally. I see a girl being made to believe that nothing untoward would happen to her if she’s covered from head to toe. Of course, we all know that is not true.
But what do you see?
My mom wore a saree to school 8th standard onwards. That was the rule in every school back then. I think. At least, where my mom grew up. I’m talking about the 70s here. A girl being asked to transition from wearing a skirt to a saree as she grew visibly was perhaps not scrutinized under a lens back then. Right or wrong, I don’t know.
When it was my turn to go to school, there was nothing like this, though. No such rule. At least in the few schools in Shillong. This is about the 90s and very early 2000s that I’m talking about.
I never had to switch to a saree or a salwar suit just because I hit puberty or had a growth spurt. I was just another student. I wasn’t specifically made to feel that I needed to suddenly dress a different way on account of my biology.
And maybe because of that, today, I find dressing young school going girls in saree, well how do I put it? Not quite right, perhaps.
Before you draw any conclusions, I must add that I have nothing against the saree. And also, I don’t think dressing children in saree when they go to school has anything to do with our culture. Thus, I’m not questioning that either.
I just want the school girl to be a school girl. She should be uninhabited and unshackled. Certainly not be made to believe that how she is perceived depends on her attire.
I never had to switch to a saree or a salwar suit just because I hit puberty or had a growth spurt. Share on X
Why dress her different all of a sudden?
What gets my goat is this unfair perception and implementation. The sad reality that this is being done to prevent untoward incidents with girls. Or, to put it blatantly, to not entice boys or men. Yes, there’s where my whole problem with it lies. It is a primitive thought process which seems to be pro-perpetrator more than anything else. Shielding those who might do wrong instead of who might be wronged. Instead of teaching boys and men to keep their libido in check, we, in the guise of culture, are placing the onus on girls. Very, very young girls, I should add. And I hate that. Don’t you?
A school girl is so impressionable, so delicate that we need to be very, very careful with the message we send her. And why only a girl? What message are we sending to those boys who are her classmates? They are equally young and impressionable, aren’t they?
Are we telling those young boys that the girls have something that needs to be hidden? And if not hidden, there’s something wrong? That the girl is, for lack of a better phrase, asking for it? Are we saying that standards for judging a boy and a girl are different right from the start?
God, I hope not.
Something is not quite right with this approach. It sends out the wrong message with severe repercussions for the future. Very severe indeed.
What do you think?
Students used to wear sarees to school? Gosh! Where I live, we find girls trying to hike their skirts up more just to look cool! 😀
But the reason behind wearing a saree is just not justified. As you said, wearing a saree only attracts the boys' attention that something has changed in the girls in their class. If we need to do something about changing the mindset that a girl needs to be properly covered to prevent any untoward harm to her, this "saree" state of affairs must be addressed soon!
Reading your post made me think of the one that was recently share on children loaded with makeup. Sometimes, a dress or that blusher robs children out of their innocence and what message it sends? That they are not children anymore. I am with you on that Nabanita!
Great picture and a thought provoking post.
Your Posts stir me inside out…
a thought provoking post… and the last paragraph that voiced your questions, i have had those same questions disturbing me during my own formative years of high school… untoward stares would embarrass me for days…
It is the mentality of pointing finger at the other and passing the blame. Who has the time and energy to look within? For the girls, this marks the beginning of the life-long thinking process that everything is wrong with them. We cannot change the society but can we give our girls the positivity and confidence to believe in themselves, even when they are dressed up in a saree or a mekhela.
Unfortunately, we don't live in an ideal world.. Even as I read your post, the television screen shows how a Bangalore girl was abducted in a public place.
Btw, you grew up in Shillong? Have you read Anjum Hassan's Lunatic in my Head? It captures the spirit of the city beautifully. Do read, if you haven't.
something is wrong with the thought that wearing a saree keeps a girl safe…and it is so not true…what are teaching our young girls?
This problem is worldwide. There's a constant fight to prevent teenaged girls from revealing too much of themselves. Meanwhile, somehow, that is never a problem with boys. But, on the other hand, I know of no public school code as restrictive as these you are picturing, either. When I was growing up the fight was permitting girls to wear pants to school. Alanaramblinwitham.blogspot.com
It is sadly pushing forward a "forbidden fruit" mindset… in forcibly showcasing the differences and the need to hide, they are making the child bear the burden of the guilt of the adults mindset.
I always point out the irony that in my own Mallu land, men walk around in buniyans and lungis raised so high up their knees, a breeze would show you two scoops you don't ever wanna randomly see.
And yet, the same men are the ones calling women vulgar for wearing jeans!
A thought provoking post…nicely written:-)
In the countryside, girls still wear Mekhela chaddar to school. And in some KV it is mandatory to wear salwar Kameez from class 8. I never gave it much thought at that time. Probably because I always followed the rule without questioning. But now I realize how much pressure society puts on girls, starting from early childhood, to conform to their mindset. The switch in school uniform is enough to mould her personality and thinking . Brilliant post Naba. Now that A to Z is over… I am back to reading your awesome posts 😀
I think a saree is a beautiful attire. But, having said that, it makes no sense that a school girl has to wear a saree to school where she goes to study, make friends, play and all the other things school girls and boys must do. they should have uniforms for the discipline bit.. I understand. But maybe schools should think about having a uniform for both boys and girls – Pants and shirt – maybe give an option to girls if they would like to wear skirts.
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Oh. I'm not that aware of clothing dos and dont's in your culture. This has been really enlightening and informative.
Hi Naba, after a long time i am visiting your blog again
& it is a sheer pleasure reading your thoughts as always. Having said that, I do not fully agree with your take on wearing a Saree to the school. There is no defined guidelines as to what could be a school uniform. Neither there is a choice. Even if it is skirts/ tunics like I had, we are bound to wear them. We didn't have a choice there. Similarly, why can't we see sari as a school uniform? By denying this, we are forcing ourselves to believe that it is an attire meant for adults, but is it so? When we go to south India, we find even the kids donning saris.Why can't a saree be a uniform, just like a dress/ tunic or skirt?
But yes I agree fully with you that The amount of energy we put on saving our girls from untoward incidents can be very well spent on upbringing our boys right 🙂
Hmm…we do have different scales for measuring impressionable -ty (yes, I know it's not a word – my vocab is pretty limited 😛 ) for boys and girls.
I'm not quite sure what to say about young girls wearing saree to schools; I mean, there might be a bit of regional differences here. In South India, I've seen young girls wear them frequently; but yes, I sometimes wonder if they're being made to grow up faster than they should be. Just my thoughts
I agree with you on all counts. It's a way of controlling a woman's body and a way of saying she is responsible for what happens to her. I guess in this day and age, something similar is the length of skirts that is policed for girls. While I get it doesn't make sense to have too short skirts, a school in New Zealand recently asked all the girls to lengthen their skirts as it was distracting for boys and male teachers. Because you know, the males don't have brains to control their desires. Sigh.