What you are is never dependent on the world’s perception of you. Why? Well, because, trust me when I say this, the world will always find something wrong with you and they won’t stop short of saying it on your face. As humans we have this tendency to scrutinize endlessly, and more often than not in a negative way. For us, the flaws matter more than strengths. Yes, somehow we find it easier to see the worse in everyone apart from our very own selves.
You know, I have never found it in me, whether the courage or even the audacity, to comment on someone’s choice of clothes or perhaps food. And that to on their face. I find it to be an extremely rude and mannerless thing to do. But then sometimes I feel I’m the only one adhering to this unspoken rule of not crossing the line. Yes, maybe within the immediate family you can do that and it’s even expected. But not so when you are just an acquaintance. I don’t know, what do you think?
Just a few days back when my sister was placed in one of the top 4 consultancy companies of the world, a neighbor of my parents commented with her half-baked knowledge that it was one of the worst companies in the world. Now, she is sitting at home doing nothing, completely dependent on her aged parents without any clue about the IT industry. My parents could have said it on her face that she has no idea of what she is talking about, right there. But they didn’t do that out of courtesy but they did feel bad about it. At such occasions, I wonder if it is okay to cross that line and make it know to such nincompoops that they need to keep their opinions to themselves. But somehow I find it extremely hard to do that.
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And that’s not all, there are people who go on to talk about your weight, your teeth, your choice of accessories and what not! I personally feel that it’s not appropriate for anyone to do that. And here’s where being good turns to something uncomfortable. What happens is out of courtesy, you don’t retort back but that bad taste lingers. I have never commented on anyone’s dresses, shoes or anything else for that matter no matter how ridiculous they might have appeared to me. I have never commented on anyone’s choice of food or the way they eat. I find it astounding when people comment on the food habits of people from other parts of the country or even the world in a derogatory fashion. Where is the restraint? And yes, all this is not healthy banter. More often than not these things are said seriously.
While it is human tendency to think that what we do is the best, is it really necessary to make it known? Well, I certainly don’t think so.
Well, that is what I feel. Now, tell me what you think about it all. Am I just being over sensitive? It could be because I’m going through a phase of bad mood swings these days. Still, do tell me what you feel about this.
Until next time.
Ciao!
i would never give my opinion unless asked, but when asked i give an honest opinion. if something is not good, its not. i am not the one to sugar coat things.
You know that Hindi song na – Kuch toh log kahenge, logon ka kaam hai kehna…..why bother, really? But I do understand some of the angst you express in this post. However all said and done, for our own sanity and peace of mind it is better to let go of such things because you can't really change anyone's attitude.
Never mind Naba! In life I have found that it is people who are dissatisfied with their own lives who go around spraying negativity about other people's lives. The only answer to such people is to say, "Stop worrying about my life and get on with yours." 🙂 How else do you think I found it so easy to go against the current in so many of my life choices? 🙂
Very bold writing! Kudos to you,Its the brave that make choices and carry on with their individual needs the weak just follow the herd.
But why even bother about someone's opinion based on half baked knowledge. Better to ignore.
Even I find it hard to say such things! When my friends sit and comment on others, I just sit there thinking about how they can do that. I know from experience that they won't stop even if I ask. So I just ignore the discussion!
I don't think that your retorting will make any difference both to their ignorance and their uncultured behavior. Some people are plain obnoxious. I know what you say when you say that you feel bad at not responding. I've been there many times. Now, I smile and move on. Believe me, showing that you are unaffected works best. If it is on a daily basis then it makes sense to firmly give it back or at least let the other person know. Random people are best ignored.
What a day ro read this post! Nincompoops they are. This tendency it seems is gaining momentum with time. People have opinion on anything and everything and find it absolutely necessary to make it known to others. They do not bother if their words have any value or not, if their words hurt others, or if it can affect the other person for a lifetime. To such tribe the only important thing is to speak and spread negativity. Sick of them.
What a day ro read this post! Nincompoops they are. This tendency it seems is gaining momentum with time. People have opinion on anything and everything and find it absolutely necessary to make it known to others. They do not bother if their words have any value or not, if their words hurt others, or if it can affect the other person for a lifetime. To such tribe the only important thing is to speak and spread negativity. Sick of them.
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Let go, is what I have learnt to Naba. People and their opinions!! Huh! But unlike you, there have been times when I have told them off, but you know, you don't find peace even then. Letting go, helps!
Nabanita, people are mean because they want to build themselves up by putting someone else down. People with a strong sense of self worth never do that. Anyway, people who make personal comments are the losers. They are unhappy with themselves and want everyone else to be too
Petty people small talk. I cant stand people who comment on others lifestyle and then there are some who even give advices which are so annoying. Follow my policy , such people are best ignored.
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