Do We Change With Time?

Oct 26
NabanitaDhar


Do you think we change with time?

As you probably may have heard a million times already, change is the only constant in life. It is like one of those necessary evils you just can’t do without. The wheels of life keep rolling, changing you one revolution at a time.
If you think about it, you probably aren’t who you were, say, a year ago anymore. In fact, why even go so far as a year? You may not even be the same person you were a few months ago. Like it or not, stealthily these vicissitudes creep in. It is only when someone explicitly points it out or perhaps in those rare moments of clarity that you realize the extent of change. When the latter happens, it actually feels like an out of body experience. You see yourself behaving differently much against everything you thought was true about you, your approach and manner of reaction. Of course, whether the change is for the better or worse is a different thing altogether.

Now, I have no qualms in admitting that my reactions are not really matured or balanced in every aspect of life. Impulsive is perhaps an adjective that describes me best. Hence, on several occasions I may come up with a response which is passionate to the tee but not entirely objective. It’s not to say I don’t recognize that but I don’t admit that everyday either ,well, with me being me. Reacting impulsively is more my thing. But for the past few weeks there have been occasions when I have astonished myself with my response on several fronts. It appears as though I’ve suddenly become more open to listening and thinking from someone else’s perspective. This, trust me, is very strange and even scary for it is completely alien to me.

What do I mean?

My reactions to certain incidents and my take on certain controversial topics have been completely opposite to what they would normally have been, several times actually. I sort of watched myself, almost as if from a distance, choose being sensible over being reactive or myopic.

I’m not sure if it makes any sense. Also, in no ways have I become more logical or enlightened but some nuances of wisdom have certainly crept in. Of course, I’m not sure if this is a fleeting change or here to last.

Here’s what I feel. With age, experience and time, you, I and every single individual on the face of the earth undergoes some kind of change or the other. Gradually over a period of time, lot of invisible changes coalesce into something tangible, almost always without caution. Perhaps that is what it is and I hope this one lasts. It’s nice to not be hot-headed at all times. Calmness is quite enjoyable actually. I’m sure S would laugh because we both know how much of a tectonic shift is needed to actually introduce myself as calm, collected and balanced. But that’s a discussion for another day.

Tell me have you experienced something similar as well?

Do we really change with time?


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36 thoughts on “Do We Change With Time?”

  1. It's a fascinating concept about the way we change. I'm writing my memoirs about my early life at the moment, and it's very hard to see why I accepted what went on around me with such a calm attitude. So screaming, no bucking the authorities. Just fitting in.

  2. Oh we all change. I have changed so much and I feel I am still. Don't know when will it is stop – for good or worse can't say but yes, for sure 🙂
    Food for thought!

  4. I think change is inevitable, Nabanita. Just this afternoon I was thinking of my 15 year old self and wondering why I was such a diffident creature then! Time has made me much more self-assured.

  5. I have changed a lot over the past few years. And I love the change. A lot more patient and calm and probably wiser too 🙂

  7. Was talking with a fellow blogger last night and we were reminiscing about how much we have changed ourselves since the start of the year. I think it comes down to the decisions we make and the way things around us change too…
    the best we can do is reassess where we stand and try to change accordingly.

  8. Yes of course… Guys I never thought were handsome, seem good-looking now!! Just joking.. Of course, we change according to our experiences in life. Isnt that why we mellow down as we age? Good one Nabanita.

  9. I absolutely agree that we change with time and i feel, its required too.. we learn many things in life and so we change and mature as individuals gradually.

  10. Definitely we will change and will continue to change. I believe it's part of evolution. And if we don't like the way we change it will be a difficult situation to deal with. I'm glad that you ate changing into aa calmer and wiser version, Naba. It's inevitable isn't it? 🙂

  11. Have you experienced it? My love I am an epitome of this. In fact all that you wrote the conflicting reactions, the myopic perspective I was shouting out 'me me me'. In fact I tried to mellow down a little but it only bottles up things inside and bursts out in worse measures…

  12. Oh yes, we change, and grow, we reflect and mature. I think it's called "wisdom!"

    I particularly found my late 30s and 40s to be times of great change – I think it is natural to an extent, but I also went through a number of things that caused me to change and grow.

  14. It is natural for us to change – because experience is a wonderful and great teacher, Naba. As we grow (older) we become stronger and our perceptions and perspective of things change. In my case, I've noticed myself become far more tolerant and amused at the things that used to freak me out. So – to repeat a cliche – change is good. And we must change with time. Mmuah. I hope you're taking care of yourself. Love.

  15. That's wonderful writing about the changes in a memoir…So much to look back at and so much to relive and comprehend about how one has changed and evolved

  18. Time seems to do that na Corinne? Any change that makes us self assured certainly is a good change I think 🙂

  21. Agreed Roshan…In fact I was just thinking how what and how I write has also changed and what I feel about issues, react to them..I guess it's all that life is about!

  24. It is I guess Vinitha…I would like to think before reacting because I certainly haven't been doing that as well in the past 🙂

  25. Oh you know that is what I worry about, that my balanced and matured reaction now will eventually lead to a much worse reaction later…

  28. True, most cliches are usually true no? Well, atleast the ones that make sense..

    And thanks Vidya 🙂 I'm taking care of myself 🙂

    Love <3

  29. I guess change is the food for our soul.. isn't it? And it's for good only.. I am so glad the way I am than yesterday.. and Yesterday I was glad to be from the one who I was day before.. and the cycle continues..

    Very thoughtful thing you've discussed Naba 🙂

    Cheers

  31. I have definitely changed! I think it is for the better too! I am more calmer now, and no longer take anything personally. I have also learned to say 'no', something I never did before! I am sure I'll keep changing in the future too…after all we aren't trees, right?

  34. Rightly said … I think the more we accept change the more we mature and evolve much like old age and wine 🙂

  35. Of course we change with time. Sometimes the change is good and sometimes it is not. But imagine how boring it would be if we were the same since we were born? goo goo gaa gaa?

  36. Time changes us because of the experiences, challenges and changes that it brings along with it. We tend to grow and respond according to the situations. That changes us as a person, even the way we talk and our attitude. Grow with time and do not let yourself down is what I would say

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