God helps those who help themselves.
We have all been told this at one point or the other. Well, today, I’m telling this to myself.
Honestly, these past few days have not really been that great for me. Stress, both physical and mental, has led me to a proverbial cave where all I can see and feel are darkness and anxiety. With M having the motions, I’m terrified that it’ll lead to dehydration. This fear perhaps stems from the fact that my sister had to be admitted to the hospital as an infant for the very same reason. That added to the physical exertion involving taking care of an infant has practically drained me. The stress at work about getting a suitable project seems relentless. And then there is the omnipresent feeling of always being on the run carrying multiple bags through a crowded platform as if to catch a train that I just cannot miss. Everything combined together has resulted in a constant sick feeling from the pit of my stomach that I just can’t seem to get rid of. Maybe, I’m a little depressed, I don’t really know. But what I do know is that I need to pull myself together. Or, like Po, find my inner peace.
Our own #happiness depends on us and #gratitude definitely, plays a huge part in reaching there. Share on X.
Today being the International Day of Peace, it seems even more appropriate that I do this. After all, we cannot bring peace to our surroundings without first being centered individuals ourselves. Right? And interestingly today, I read something that could actually help me in attaining that. While reading Arianna Huffington’s Thrive: The Third Metric of Redefining Success, I came across this passage which made a lot of sense to me, especially now when I haven’t been in the best of moods.
In our daily lives, moving from struggle to grace requires practice and commitment. But it’s in our hands. I’ve come to believe that living in a state of gratitude is the gateway to grace.
So, gratitude is the key and I’m willing to give it a try, for my sake more than anyone else’s. I have experienced the power of gratitude before in the fall of 2014 when both my parents were having health issues. It was a harrowing time, really. Those were the days when I would often find myself crying in a hospital corner, away from the prying eyes of my loved ones. Even during that phase, I had realised that our own happiness depends on us and gratitude definitely plays a huge part in reaching there. Gratitude was something with which I sought inner peace then and that’s what I wish to attempt today, as impossible as it might seem. In fact, make it a daily activity as well if possible.
The Oxford clinical psychologist Mark Williams suggests the “ten finger gratitude exercise,” in which once a day you list ten things you’re grateful for and count them out in your fingers. Sometimes it won’t be easy. But that’s the point – “intentionally bringing into awareness the tiny, previously unnoticed elements of the day.” – Arianna writes in her book.
In fact, it is not just a theory. She goes on to write.
According to a study by researchers from the Univerity of Minnesota and the University of Florida, having participants write down a list of positive events at the close of a day – and why the events made them happy – lowered their self-reported stress levels and gave them a greater sense of calm at night.
Since calm and lower stress levels are what I need, I might as well try this, today and every day going forward. It doesn’t even need any investment except maybe 5 minutes a day. And what better day to start this practice than today which is also World Gratitude Day?
Inner peace, inner peace, inner peace!
So, inner peace, if you are listening, I’m grateful for….
A loving family. I can’t express what they are to me and how they make my life meaningful.
My daughter, who even though a handful, makes me smile at the unlikeliest of times with her unassuming reactions.
My husband and my sister who readily serve as my punching bags. What would I do without them? Who would suffer my tantrums?
My sister living in the same city. I don’t know what I would have done without her near me. Thank God, she got that transfer from Pune.
Blogging. There is nothing that helps me deal with stress better than it does. Writing heals me through blogging which lets me connect with more like minded people.
Books. They offer me an escape, a much needed one, where I don’t have to bother about booking a cab, managing hours at work or changing a diaper.
A comfortable life. Yes, even with the stress, I cannot be blind to the fact that I have a comfortable life.
Food. I don’t know about you but food brings comfort to me. Eating that favourite curry or going to that favourite restaurant makes me feel better. I’m lucky that I can do all of that.
A job. Yes, even though I have a lot of complaints about the policies or the lack of those thereof at work to aid working mothers, I’m still grateful that every morning I have a place to go to. It offers me a release that I need.
M’s creche and the people who take care of her there. I probably don’t say it enough but if not for them, working mothers like me would find it a lot tougher than it already is.
Cabs. Yes, for one who commutes daily with an infant and her heavy bags, cabs are a saving grace. And the best part is most of the drivers are helpful as well.
A comfortable home. Having a place to hide from all that bothers me, a safe and comfortable one at that, what more could I ask for?
Well, looks like I got more than 10 things to be grateful for, which is a good start. Even though I still feel virtually out of breath, It’s still a start. I’m sure repeating this every night will only help me. Well, at least I hope it will.
Tell me, what are the things you are grateful for today?
This is a beautiful post. Your doing such lovely reading these days. These ups and downs with kids can drive anyone up the wall. No words will make your experience easier except doing what you are doing now. It is commendable that you are holding on to positivity get through to the tougher phases in life. I loved your gratitude list. There is so much to be happy about even when things are not going that well. Love and hugs.
Thanks , Rachna. I’m enjoying this new genre. I never thought I could enjoy something other than fiction but I guess I do and I love that 🙂 Hugs right back to you and you know something? I’m grateful for friends like you too. Thank you for being a part of my life 🙂
NabanitaDhar recently posted…Choosing To Be Grateful – A Way To Inner Peace
Indeed a wonderful post. Reminding ourselves of gratitude surely relieves stress, makes us calm.
Keep moving is the key word. Struggles will come and go as they are part of life, one must not surrender to the hard times and work towards remaining positive and calm.
Thanks, Swati. I’m really trying to do that, trying to see the silver lining actually 🙂
NabanitaDhar recently posted…Choosing To Be Grateful – A Way To Inner Peace
I love the quote from Arianna and the list of things you’re grateful for. How beautiful is, this emotion, of being thankful for what we have? Beautiful post, thanks for sharing! 🙂
Radhika Mundra recently posted…Book Review- ‘Motions and Moments: More Essays on Tokyo’ By Michael Pronko
Thanks. I loved the quote too. In fact, I’m loving the book as well 🙂
NabanitaDhar recently posted…Choosing To Be Grateful – A Way To Inner Peace
This is a wonderfully upbeat post… i need to get my hands on Arianna’s book. been feeling quite down in recent times & i need to get over it by realizing all i have in my favour
Take care, Roshan and do read her book, I’m loving it especially now since I’m feeling so low constantly.
NabanitaDhar recently posted…Choosing To Be Grateful – A Way To Inner Peace
Gratitude is the best destressor (sp?) I know, Naba! Glad you find it so too.
Corinne Rodrigues recently posted…Gratefully Present In The Present #MondayMusings
It is , Corinne. Hugs <3
NabanitaDhar recently posted…Choosing To Be Grateful – A Way To Inner Peace
The book by Arianna seems like something we should all read.. Enjoyed reading your post.
Oh yes we all should , Bhavya. It is a great book actually, I’m still halfway through it but I think I’ll like the rest of the book too.
NabanitaDhar recently posted…Choosing To Be Grateful – A Way To Inner Peace
Hope you are feeling better. I have experienced the power of gratitude. And this is such a beautiful list. Say a gratitude prayer and carry on, love! I am going to try the 10 finger exercise.
Aditi recently posted…A walk around Hampstead Heath #LondonDiaries
Thanks, Aditi. I’m trying still not rid of that feeling which makes me upset but at least I’m trying. Anyways, do let me know how the 10 finger exercise works for you. I’m doing it myself too 🙂
NabanitaDhar recently posted…Choosing To Be Grateful – A Way To Inner Peace
Love your gratitude list, Nabanita. I was watching a scene from Bluffmaster where Boman Irani asks Abhishek Bachchan why one remembers only 30 days in life and where the rest of the days has gone. It’s very touching and great reminder when things get tough.
Oh yes, I remember that dialogue. It makes so much sense, you are right, Vishal
NabanitaDhar recently posted…Choosing To Be Grateful – A Way To Inner Peace
A wonderful, honest post. May you continue to seek for your inner peace. It is a life long journey but well worth it.
Thanks. Wish you the same too 🙂
NabanitaDhar recently posted…Choosing To Be Grateful – A Way To Inner Peace
Beautifully expressed feeling of gratitude through wonderful choice of words. Loved it, Naba !!!
Vasantha Vivek recently posted…Nurturing Thursday : Anything #MyFriendAlexa
Thanks, Vasantha
NabanitaDhar recently posted…Choosing To Be Grateful – A Way To Inner Peace
A beautiful post Naba truly expressing gratitude for the numerous things we take for granted! Only when one of them goes missing do we really understand, how important it is! Stay blessed!
So true, Kala. Only when we lose something or going through tough times do we remember to count our blessings. I wish we would remember to do it everyday .
NabanitaDhar recently posted…Choosing To Be Grateful – A Way To Inner Peace
The first two years are the hardest Naba. Things do ease out after that. Not that you do not have worries but they’re of a different kind. I have been venting my worries on my blog too. Reading this post reminded me how bad it was when the twins were babies and when they fell ill. I am grateful for the doctors who were around then and also that I’m done with that phase. You’ll learn to worry less soon enough – once you realise that the doctors are pretty capable of helping out your daughter. She will be fine and so will you.
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