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My day starts at about 6 in the morning these days. I get off the bed and walk like a zombie to the kitchen. Of course, I surround my little one with as many pillows as I can so that she doesn’t roll over. It’s important, I tell you.
One by one I turn on all the four burners of the stove as I go through the mental checklist for the day. From hot drinking water to M’s meals, I work nonstop on autopilot to finish everything before the maid knocks at the door. Yes, knocks because she is not allowed to ring the bell, lest M wakes ups. Well, a mother’s got to do what a mother’s got to do. Thank God, my maid plays along.
Busy mornings where I’m proverbially moving around the house in roller skates getting things done, leave me with no time for myself.
The thing which many don’t know about working mums is that when we send our babies to the daycare, we don’t necessarily outsource everything to those wonderful caregivers. Well, working mums is a wrong term to use here because we know all mums work – stay-at-home or office going. Anyways. The fact is before dropping M off at the creche, I need to pack everything that she might need during the course of her day there. And it’s a long list which translates into a much heavier bag, I must say. Sometimes I don’t even realise where my mornings go.
Do you know I haven't put on any nail polish for months now? #Motherhood Share on X
It has been over six months since I had a leisurely cup of tea in the morning sitting at my balcony. I miss those carefree days. My morning tea has now become one of those things I do mechanically. To be out of the house by 8 with everything ready is a daunting task. Well, at least for me. But once you are a mum, you kind of specialise in the difficult, don’t you?
Such busy mornings where I’m proverbially moving around the house in roller skates getting things done, leave me with no time for myself. My baths are now squeezed in a 10 to 15-minute window. No, no don’t worry I don’t stink. I don’t spend time deciding what I should wear to work anymore. Whatever fits works for me. My last thought before going to sleep and first on waking up is the sequence in which I should start preparing the food items. Chop, wash, fry, boil, blanch are words I think in terms of at the most peaceful hour of the day.
It has been over six months since I had a leisurely cup of tea in the morning sitting at my balcony. #Motherhood Share on X
Do you know I haven’t put on any nail polish for months now? Not that I miss it but still. Morning cuppa is just a fancy term from my past life or so it seems these days. The silver lining though is there are two things I haven’t traded yet and I won’t – my writing and reading.
Amidst all these, there is hardly any time to pack lunch for me. But when I do, this is what happens. I mix up lids and often end up taking empty boxes to work. Mommy stress, perhaps?
Does it happen to you? Did it happen to you?
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#MommyTalks | Random Thoughts Naba
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A mother’s world… so chaotic! When people tell you about the wonders of motherhood, they tend to skim over the hard work involved… don’t they? Morning cuppa, nail paint, random outfits? I feel you sistah! Would it be comforting to know there are many who do the same thing and give up smaller pleasures of life for the young ones?
So awesome that you are still reading and writing through it all… that connection to yourself sans the mother identity is so very important! Kudos….
And those interchanged lids? they are cute… I switch my pink and purple ones on purpose 🙂
Oh yes, Naba. I can completely relate to what you say. It happened to me and still happens to me. Our lives are so hectic. When they are younger, you need to be more hands-on in helping them with the tiniest chores. When they are older, their studies, the constant struggle to keep them suitably engaged, motivated, on the right path consumes you. I wonder if it ever gets easier for mothers.
I wrote my own post and linked it here. 🙂
I agree that we ‘specialise in difficult’ as mom irrespective of working mom or not. We moms have to run around doing everything for our little ones and your post reminded me of times when we need a break but can’t as being a mom is a full time job. Ah! nail paint! Waiting for those carefree days.
Running on roller skates is the thing every mom will identify with. Our moms run on roller skates even now when we visit them, isn’t it. Jokes apart, it is tough managing everything with the baby and having just a 2 hour window in the morning would really be stressful. Commendable about you is the fact that you have continued your reading and writing.
Oh yes oh yes. Mornings are the craziest. The nights were worse till the kids started sleeping through them. Is little M sleeping through yet? The morning cup of tea is still a dream other than weekends. When the kids were younger I once wore a different earring in each ear to their school and I still haven’t gotten over the embarrassment!
Why dont you keep a maid for chopping and kneading. Also she can help you out with your cooking (like stirring the food occasionally etc.) Also other mundane works like drying/folding the clothes can be outsourced to a maid. Rest I leave it to you where you can find ways and means to make your life simpler even if it requires looking out for extra hands to help.
Totally understand you, Naba. I remember how I used to struggle to take even a 5-minute shower. It gets better as they grow older but as Rachna says, kids will still occupy a large portion of our lives. And, nail paint? what’s that? 😉 I had published a parenting post on Saturday. Not sure if it qualifies for a link up here.
I’ve watched my sister-in-law do this when her children were much younger and I was always filled with great respect for young mums like you, balancing it all. That you manage to read and write is fantastic. Stay blessed.
Oh yes, it did happen. And even now, with a 4 year old, it does happen. Though things will get a little better. Morning cuppa will come back into your life, and won’t be just a thing of the past. But of-course you will have to be an early bird to enjoy it in peace. 🙂
Ah yeah, that’s the story of my sis-in-law’s life. Right from the moment she wakes up at 6 till the time her head hits the pillow at 11:30/12 am…no time to gulp the coffee that’s gone cold, no time to eat breakfast, no time to glance at herself in the mirror as she dresses up in whatever she finds before leaving for work and no time to meet her bff and chat aimlessly for hours on the phone. And, that’s the life story of countless women around us. But, that’s life! Sigh.
I never used to praise my mother of her efforts when I was a child. But then, who does, right? But now a days, as I grow older and find myself on the verge of break down sometimes, I look back at the times when my mother raised me. She would have been 30-35 at those times when I was a kid and I now wonder how she could have balanced her personal needs and my laments so much so that it wouldn’t affect either one of us.
Kudos to you for being a wonderful mother!
That is such a good point about all the work that goes into getting your child to the daycare provider and getting to work. I think people forget how much goes into just getting out the door.
Yes Nana, totally relate to every single word u say. My mind is occupied at all.times . From what to cook,to making sure I stock up the kitchen and home, to school and work schedules. I movie like a zombie too… it’s only on weekends when I try to switch off and just cook whatever I can lay my hands on.
You are right SAHM ,WAHM,or a working mom everyone is super buSy. Trying to do everything takes its toll.Getting out of home by 8 am sounds frantic.Hope 2017 is less of a rush for you
Hugs Naba. There are days where we forget that we exist. That’s how chaotic is motherhood. You, being a working mom,must be a lot busier than me. But you get to talk to other grown ups other than your husband, that’s a good thing. There are days I spend totally on baby talk. At the end of which I am exhausted like hell. But those smiles, can’t live without them!
Yes Naba! I can totally relate to you. I have made it look natural too. only when I throw away the so lovingly bought nail polishes away do I remember how awfully I have began ignoring myself. In fact I still do it, I have began complaining recently that my mind is working faster and my hands are not coping to the speed. I do feel exhausted at times – but isn’t motherhood all these and more!